Current WIPs

Melancholy Mummy Posted on by

I have a few works in progress currently, with a plan of releasing the first few of a series of shorter novels next year. I’m hoping that it will spur me on to keep writing. To get there, I still have a fair bit of work to do though, and I thought I’d make a list here. If nothing else, it will make it a bit easier for myself to get an overview of where I’m at!

The Howertys

Genre: Historical Romance (Regency)
Planned: A series of four books, all stand-alone, but connected by all being about the same family. Hoping to publish the first book in 2021.
Status:

Book 1: A Midsummer Night’s Kiss

Written. ~95-100k
Currently being posted on Wattpad with minor edits. Will need a proper edit before publication.

Book 2: Kissing the Rake

Written. ~95k
Needs full edit/proofread.

Book 3 & 4 are yet to be written, but they have a basic plot, the third also semi-plotted.

The Spellbound Series

Genre: Fantasy Romance
Planned: A series of X number of books all set in the same fantasy world, each with its own love story. Sort of stand-alone, but beneficial to read in order due to overarching plot spanning the series.
Status:

Prequel: Shadows & Lace

Written, but needs to be extended and edited/proofread. New scenes/additional details. (Currently 33k)

Book 1: Bowstrings & Velvet

Written, but is having a rather large rewrite, adding dual POV (from single) and extending with several new scenes. (Currently 33k)

Book 2: Damask & Deception

In progress, nearly finished. Will hopefully only need editing/proofreading. (Currently 56k)

Book 3: Silk & Steel

In progress, but on hold since I can only write one at a time. (Currently 21k)

Book 4 onwards: Ideas only so far. I will most likely switch the order slightly, making D&D book 3 or 4 and Silk & Steel a little further down the line as well.

I’m really excited about both of my series, and I really hope I can find the time and energy to pull this together and actually publish something next year. I’d like to try to release the first four or so Spellbound books on a somewhat regular schedule, hopefully giving myself time to prepare more stories while doing that. It’s why I want to have a few of them ready before I start releasing. I also want to release the first Howerty novel next year. So a lot to do to get ready. Wish me luck!

Lockdown 2.0

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As of yesterday, Thursday 5 November, England is in lockdown again due to rising numbers of the Coronavirus. I’m kicking myself for not taking the chance to visit my family in Sweden in August when the cases were relatively low. I doubt I will see them for quite a few more months now, and it’s already been a year since I last did. It makes me sad since they miss out on a lot not seeing the tiny tyrant for such a long time.

The lockdown is meant to last for four weeks, but I’m not convinced it won’t continue longer than that. I’m not sure how I feel about it, if I’m honest. I know it’s needed, but I hate not being able to see family and friends. It’s not as severe as the first part of the last lockdown when there was no seeing anyone anywhere. At least we’re allowed to see one person outdoors. But that’s it. Two people total, you and one other person. And with winter approaching, outdoor meetings aren’t always ideal.

It also means having to entertain the tiny tyrant without meeting up with her friends. We can meet one set of friends now and then, as preschoolers don’t count. So I and one other parent can meet up outside with our young children. Which is a blessing, really. As much as I wish they had kept the rule where six people were allowed to meet outdoors, I’m happy that at least we can see someone.

Everything about this pandemic depresses me though. Some days I feel like it’s the end of life as we know it. Some days I think it will be the thing that kills me. Some days I think I will never again see my family.

My mind likes to paint up the worst case scenarios, and it’s up to me to tear them down. But when something like this happens, it’s difficult to find the ability to do so. Because things do look dark, and every day you read news that are far from positive. (I should probably stop reading the news.)

Writing helps. It allows me to focus on something else. Binging Netflix does too. And hugs from the tiny tyrant.

What helps you get through this pandemic?

The Worst Mum Ever

Melancholy Mummy Posted on by

I suffer from chronic fatigue (CFS) and fibromyalgia and have for quite a few years now. In that time I’ve had to learn my new limits and to try not to compare myself to others who don’t have these issues. Which is easier said than done.

Still, since moving to England I’ve managed my conditions fairly well. My chronic fatigue is ever-present, and I honestly don’t remember what the feeling of waking up well-rested feels like. (Is it even a thing? I don’t know anymore.) But I handled the fatigue well enough that I could hold down a full-time job, even if I was exhausted outside of work hours and managed little else. As for the pain, I have learned my limits. I know how far I can walk without it resulting in excruciating pain, and I know which activities just don’t work for me.

On occasion, I still over-do it of course. It’s impossible not to. I had to go to London last week to visit the Embassy and apply for a new passport. I wore a pair of boots that aren’t my usual well-walked shoes, and we did a lot of walking for several hours. That evening and the next two days I could barely move. For the most part, I do manage not to get into that situation.

In general, I feel like I have a better handle on the pain than the fatigue. The pain is endurable, while the fatigue is what really gets me.* It’s what keeps me from doing a lot of things. I just can’t find the energy a lot of the time. And I hate it.

I hated it before. I hate it even more now that I have the tiny tyrant. Mum guilt is a thing that all mothers struggle with, I think, and I definitely suffer with it. I feel like I really have things to feel guilty about.

There are times when we don’t make it out of the house for a few days, because I just cannot muster the energy. And I feel like the worst mum ever.

There are times when she wants me to sit with her on the floor and build blocks, legos, trains… and I can only do a short while before my pain makes it impossible and I have to get up. And I feel like the worst mum ever.

There are times when I’m so exhausted I just want to sit in a corner and cry because I can’t find the energy to give my child everything I wish I could. And I feel like the worst mum ever.

There are times when there are toys all over the floor and the laundry pile is bigger than the clean pile, and the dishes cover the kitchen counter, and I just can’t bring myself to tidy up. And I feel like the worst mum ever.

There are times when I visit my friends with kids, and I see their spotless homes, I see all the things they do with their kids every day, I see them do all the things I wish I could. And I feel like the worst mum ever.

I think every mum probably feels inadequate in one way or another, and I’m in no way trying to downplay those feelings for other mums. This is really just a post for me to get my own feelings out, trying to sort them through in my head. A lot of the times I just feel like such a useless waste of space, and it’s not a great feeling. People telling me I’m not, while I appreciate their sentiments… it just doesn’t make me feel any better. It doesn’t change the facts. I try not to compare myself to people who don’t have my conditions, but it’s hard. And some days I think even people with my conditions probably manage better than I do.

Still, I have a happy child (for the most part) who is hitting all her milestones (except height/weight!) and can entertain herself for stretches of time since she’s had to when mummy just isn’t able to play with her for a while. And that’s what I need to remind myself of. Every day.

What’s your worst mum guilt?

*This is purely my personal experience, and I’m fully aware that there are others out there whose fibromyalgia pains are a lot worse than mine.

The Tiniest Tyrant

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My little genome is just over 2,5 years old now (31 months), and the tiniest tyrant that ever… tyranned?

After lockdown and everything, we finally saw a Health Visitor today to check her height and weight, and she’s dropped another percentile. She’s now on the 2nd centile for weight and below all the centile lines for height. My tiny tyrant! They’re not worried though as she’s full of energy, hitting all her milestones, and of an average BMI. So, she’s just petite.

So, how tiny is she? 81 centimetres tall and weighs 10,3 kilos (22 lbs 11 oz).

I’m saving a fortune in clothing! Is what I should be saying… but the truth is that while she keeps the same size for a fair amount of time, she still needs new stuff for the seasons. And… I might be buying extra things just because they’re cute. You try to resist buying cute clothes for your child, I dare you! (Or maybe you just have more self-control than I do, that is also highly possible.) I spend more money buying clothes for her than I do myself, easily.

NaNo Boot Camp: Result

Melancholy Mummy Posted on by

So, the two weeks of my writing group’s little NaNo Boot Camp have finished, and well… I think we can safely say that I’m not quite ready for NaNo in November! I didn’t manage to write 21,000 words in two weeks, although I wasn’t too far off.

It’s possible that I would have hit the target, had the tiny tyrant not decided to have a few evenings of not going to sleep until it was so late that I struggled to squeeze any words out. With that in mind, I don’t see how I could manage to do NaNoWriMo, since I can’t see her having a full month of going to bed in a reasonable time.

Still! This is more words than I would have written in these two weeks normally, so I still consider it a win! I’m now in the final part of my latest story, and I’m quite looking forward to writing the end game. I just hope this tired mum-brain hasn’t forgotten some plot thread somewhere and left it hanging!

Next week, I’m hoping to get into some sort of routine/posting schedule on this new blog. But, knowing me, that won’t happen. See above paragraph. Tired mum-brain and routines/schedules don’t mesh well.

Chaos. I’d say I thrive in it, but it’s more of a necessary survival strategy at this point. How other writing parents get anything done, I honestly do not know. But then, I also do not know how any parent gets anything done ever. So, there’s that. (Told you this wasn’t the blog of a put-together mum who has all her ducks in a row. I lost my ducks a long time ago, and if I’m lucky, I might find one chewed up behind the couch in the future.)

NaNo Boot Camp: Week 1

Melancholy Mummy Posted on by

My first week of our two-week NaNo Boot Camp went better than expected! I hit my targets and after seven days I was right on track for the 21k end goal. Then the tiny tyrant decided that bedtime was a terrible thing and should no longer happen.

So… Today, day eight… I’ve written all of 0 words.

I will try to knock a few out at least before bedtime, but I’m definitely not hitting any targets. Fingers crossed that the tiny tyrant starts going to bed on time again so I can catch up over the next few days. I really want to hit the target, because if I do my current WIP will either have its first draft finished or nearly finished. Come on! Let’s do this!

Side note: Also, I realise things are rather quiet around here. I will try to have some semblance of a posting schedule come October after this writing challenge is finished.

We’re All Mad Here…

Melancholy Mummy Posted on by

In preparation for (possibly) entering NaNoWriMo in November, my writing group has arranged our own little NaNo Boot camp. It’s a lighter version where we’re writing 21k words in 14 days. (Which averages out at 1500 words per day.)

As a mum with a tiny tyrant… This may or may not be an achievable goal. But there are no gains without trying, right?

If nothing else, any writing I do during these two weeks will probably be more writing than I would have done. So, really – it’s a win-win situation.

Now I need to go and actually… Write 1500 words…

What have I done???

Here we go again!

Melancholy Mummy Posted on by

Oops, I did it again! Or something.

After a lot of humming and hawing, I decided that I should start fresh with a new blog. Let’s do it right this time!

The focus of the blog will be… about as focused as a mum can be, so not very focused at all, I’m afraid. You will be subjected to:

  • my idle thoughts
  • my adventures (and misadventures) as a mum of a tiny tyrant
  • how I deal (or not) with having chronic pain and fatigue
  • updates on my (not quite as prolific as I’d like) writing
  • possibly images of pets
  • anything else under the sun I might come up with

Does that sound about as disjointed as I think it does? Well, that’s what you get here at MelancholyMummy. Disjointed thoughts from a (very) tired mummy. You see, the tiny tyrant mentioned above – she thinks sleep is overrated. Me? I love sleeping. Maybe when she’s a teenager I can exact my revenge. It will be ever so sweet.

But, I digress (I do this a lot). Let’s get this show on the road! Welcome to MelancholyMummy!